What is it about Chinese-style weddings??

Last night Kevin and I went to the wedding reception for his cousin Priscilla and her new husband Ronald. The food was decent (11 courses, OMG~!!), the space was nice and the bride didn't wear anything hideous =P

Anyhow, I've noticed some weird traditions at the more recent weddings I've been too that are a bit gauche. Bear in mind that the most ideal (but still not perfect) wedding in my mind is still the one of my aunt Belinda to her husband Kelly, and that was almost 10 years ago. It was so elegant and beautiful, and had the perfect balance of her North American-born sensibilities and Chinese tradition.

Rosanna, the lady who does my eyelash extensions, is also a wedding planner and I've looked through her portfolio before while waiting for Frances. It really is a ludicrous business because you have to please a client who usually has no idea what will work and what won't and many times their demands conflict with your own sense of good taste -__-"

Pet peeves I've collected about these new-fangled Chinese weddings (and these don't all apply to the wedding I went to last night, this is just a rant):

• the couple's name in big glittery letters, made of cut out illustration board and craft glitter dumped on them
• when said glittery letters don't match in FONT or SIZE because they get re-used from couple to couple
• slip covers on the chairs, particularly SATIN slip covers -__-"
• when the bride's colour scheme doesn't work with the colours of the space. Do some homework!
• Water fountains with dyed water underneath the wedding cake
• sequins on traditional Cheongsams
• Cheongsams in neon colours -__-" If you are going to wear one, stick with red, pink, white or off-white, gold . . . whatever, but not HOT PINK.
• Karaoke. Totally inappropriate
• DJ's that blast their music so loudly you can't converse with people at your own table.
• Banquet halls that explicitly forbid clinking on the tablewear. Yes, it's noisy and sometimes annoying, but it's part of the fun at Asian weddings
• Shark's Fin soup thickened with corn starch
• Red Bean Soup for dessert. It's mundane, and not 'banquet' food.
• Photographer's that are more click-happy than client-focused.

Anyhow, despite all my ranting, their wedding was nice and they were a fun and 'co-operative' pair who knew how to please their guests ;) I've been to many lovely weddings, and also a lot of weird, wacky and horrendous weddings in my life. The prize for 'Worst Wedding' still goes to Arnold (one of my many distant relatives). The church service was 2.5 hours long, the bride dropped the ring during the service, and the dinner was FIVE hours long and the food was bad. When my elderly uncle said at the 4 hour mark that he couldn't sit anymore, about 15 of us all jumped up and said "Oh, let's help Uncle Howard too!" and high-tailed it out of there.